Tony was pretty much excited about the thought of a dinner date with his love, Aminat. Their relationship which had successfully thrived for four years was soon to transcend from just a relationship to a nuptial union– Tony was going to surprise Aminat tonight with an engagement ring!
The young man grinned from cheek to cheek in front of the mirror as he adjusted his collar. He pimped his style back to the 60’s with a well trimmed fro, accompanied by a stylish bridge on the side. When he was done with his body works, he oozed off such an aura of confidence like one who was to receive an Oscar award!
Lover man, Tony neatly tucked the box of ring in his pocket, rubbing his palm severally whilst moistening it with puffs of warm breath as he went to get the door . It was Aminat.
The two love birds wasted no second getting all romantic in the presence of the timid red candle lights burning passionately with blushes of flames.
After the mushy moment, Tony served a portion of his sumptuous meal to Aminat. As they began to eat, somewhere in between the meal and the short romantic conversations they held at the table, was Tony rehearsing his lines of proposal in his head, cautiously timing Aminat with his eyes to know when to go on his knees.
**Ping! Ping! **
Desperate pings fluted out of Aminat’s phone. Aminat of course to respond to the creaking monsters. Unwittingly, she had repeated this process back and forth severally within the session of the dinner. This was Aminat’s obsession – Her phone, social network, the little monsters!
Tony could not help but observe, sinking in irritation at Aminat’s insensitivity and lack of deference to the beautiful night which he had envisaged would become a lifetime memory for the both of them.
Regardless, he dunked down his annoyance with another spoon of his meal. But just when he had tried to catch her lost attention, her little monsters had creaked from inside her phone yet again. Without delay, she grabbed her phone to do the needful, scruffily throwing herself back into the conversation when she was done checking out her phone.
Bemused Tony had by now lost appetite for the meal, raging in his head on Aminat’s ill-mannered and uncultured behaviour– even on their supposed romantic date! Aminat who didn’t observe that his countenance had now changed, picked her phone yet again to attend to a notification.
Tony flared up.
Aminat flared up at Tony flaring up at her on their dinner date. Hell, that was totally unforgivable! Hence, she had to remind Tony of his weakness– his uncontrolled temper.
Tony in turn slams at Aminat’s uncultured and ill-mannered attitude, throwing to light his insecurities that she may be may be having affairs with other guys, behind him.
Aminat is hurt by this remark. She could swear to the heavens that she was innocent of Tony’s direct accusation. She bursts into tears for Tony’s lack of trust in her. Her night had been ruined, so she picks her bag and exits the scene immediately.
Tony is wounded. He didn’t mean to make her mad but his boo might just have another boo right inside her phone!
For a rising amount of relationships, digital technology has become an overriding necessity. Relationships are now overturned in jars and containers of digital communication.
The digital world of today poses a threat to your life and relationships! I have enlisted a few out of the many ways….
One of the product of digital technologies is social network (the little monsters), the paradox becomes an even more unsociable world. Alarming, right?
1) With the digital world, there are so much communication faucets and so little physical or real interaction. Because everyone seems readily accessible via social media, we assume they are all okay.
2) People create a much stronger identity of themselves on social media but in reality, those identities are simply fictional characters. In the real life scenario, they struggle to even be themselves! This is why many prefer virtual online encounters to real life encounters. Face-to-face conversations now become a bore!
3) We forget how to interact with people around us, matter of fact; people become invisible because planet earth now reside in our phones. The wheels of digital communication screeches from an overload while the train of real life communication moves at a slower pace.
4) We find out that we are totally dysfunctional when we are not online. Hence, when we are offline, our level of productivity drops to zero.
5) Relationships have gone digital too! Intimacy with partners are now influenced by the digital world. Sexting (sending or receiving sexually suggestive text messages or photos) statistically, has gone up on the rise among all age groups–Minors, younger adults, dating couples, and even adults in marriages!––Just about anyone with a smartphone can sext whoever they feel acquainted to. Hence, sexting may become more fun for some than real sex, depending on the level of the sexting addiction.
6) Here’s the big one– EMOTIONS ARE DIGITAL TOO! We go from all forms of “ROTFLMAO”, “LOL”, or worse off “HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA” but in reality we have our faces like a bland wall.
I once went on a week of no expression of digital emotions with my chats– just plain flow of words. And if I found the conversation funny, I’d use just one plain smiley. I got questions like –”Why are you angry?”, “Why are you being too serious?”, and more! But I wasn’t any of what they had suggested. I just didn’t express the emotion the digital way that we have mastered. Well, you guessed right, that didn’t last! LMAO! Yeah, that’s me not laughing but digitally laughing. I reverted to the digital life, lest I get termed an angry black woman.
Well, paediatric nurse Denise Daniels says “If you abbreviate your emotions with technology, you’re living an abbreviated life”
7) And the recent one I read about – “FOMO”, which means “Fear Of Missing Out”. This is a new found digital sickness trending among teenagers on social media. This digital compulsive disorder causes teenagers to be actively online 24/7 for fear of being left behind by the moving train. The disorder is said to be aroused by trending posts on social media websites. For example, #SecondaryschoolsinNigeria which trended on twitter a couple of weeks ago. So, for you all who missed it, perhaps you’re suffering from FOMO digital disorder right now. Please get well soon.
The list does not end here, in fact, it is endless!
We are an entire earth-space of hyper-stimulated digital junkies who have become evasive of our own inner minds to satisfy our relevance to the digital world. Some of us do not even consult our minds anymore to discern the littlest of things–Why do we have google, anyway?
At the end of the whole digital awkwardness, we may simply realize that outside of the digital world, we do not even have a life anymore.
If you have spotted some or more of these dangers in your everyday life and relationships, then you may be in need of a digital detox, so you can have a fresh breathe of life!
Anticipate next, some of the craziest real life stories of Digital world Addiction and how to save your relationships and your life from the consuming menace of the digital world.
Nonye J. Chidolue (Nonyewrites)
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