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I have finally come to understand this saying “As stubborn as a goat”…

Recap of DESIRE’S JOURNAL (Episode 3)

And now EP 4….

Enjoy! :D

One would think that with all the amazing adventures that I’ve found myself in, I would just sit on a chair at the park and wait for Mr Right, yeah? But no, I won’t do that, what if the idiot gets hit by a trailer or something? I just have to go out and find him. So my search continues.

It was the bestie’s birthday and trust me to look as good as the celebrant, if not better! If you had seen me, you would have thought it was my party. But it wasn’t.

I was grateful to God that Cynthia had gone with my suggestion to get a planner to handle everything if not I wouldn’t have been able to have as much fun as I did. It felt good to just relax, laugh, drink and dance with friends but as every party in the world, there were a few new faces in attendance. A friend had brought a friend, a cousin, a colleague, and the list goes on. People would always be that way.

I was having a conversation with Cynthia’s elder brother when Lucifer’s brother in human form appeared from nowhere, laid a hand on his shoulder and said “hmmm”. Ray, you haven’t introduced this Ray of Sunshine to me” .

Blushing. I think it was my yellow dress that confused him. Well, in a twinkle of an eye, Desire -yours truly, had met another wonderful guy. We pretty much hit things off from there. Since then we’ve been chatting, texting and calling, facetime, Skype, DMS, name it, we both have really tight schedules so let’s just call it your typical cyber love except for the fact that we’ve actually met physically. We finally decided to set aside Friday nights as date nights and it had been working well for us -movies, dinner date, bowling, clubbing or simply just having a cold beer and watching soccer indoors.

There’s was just a teeny-weeny problem however; on one of our date nights, I’d stumbled on a message on Efe’s phone which he sent to a contact saved as “Hannah Malaysia” and in this message, he said his name was Collins and narrated a very tragic story of how he lost his parents at a tender age and has been struggling to survive through the hunger and starvation in Africa.

I was shocked because he told me he was an Engineer and he talks to his ‘mum’ almost every time we are together, and oh, he eats a lot and his name is definitely not Collins!

Anyways, I tried to forget it because I felt guilty about going through his phone and invading his privacy so I just said nothing about it. One Saturday morning, the night before which I had spent in his house, I got carried away while we were watching a movie and he was sweet enough to allow me sleep in his room while he slept in the guest room.

That morning, I made my way to the kitchen to fix breakfast for the both of us when I heard the first knock. I thought it was the newspaper guy dropping off the paper but it was Ray (Cynthia’s brother). Oh well! An extra person for breakfast, I thought. I quickly increased the quantity of what I was making. I was almost done when they both came in and said they would like to talk to me. hmmmm!

So ends the wonderful dance that has been going on for a while.

HIM: “Desire, you have been so good to me, you have made a lot of positive changes in my life and mean a lot to me,that is why I know that you would be the best person for me”

Is he proposing? Somebody HELP, I can’t breathe!

HIM: “Desire can you hear me?”

ME: “Oh yes, yes continue please”…….

HIM: “I would like for you to be my BEARD” (Please consult wikipedia for the meaning)

ME: Your what? Are you mad?

HIM: Calm down please, actually I and Ray have been in a relationship for the past two years but we can’t just come out and tell this to the world, so we need you to act as my wife.

It’s all over o WTF???*!

A knock on the door distracts me and I think  I heard someone say Interpol. Pause. Rewind. Continue…

YEAH! That’s what I heard- Interpol and then – I remembered the hungry John message to Hannah Malaysia and how he was always so into his phones and laptop. My brain finally started working as it should and that was when it dawned on me, efe was a yahoo boy, g boy or whatever they call themselves nowadays and most importantly, he’s GAY!

Life as I know it, has finally come to an end.

Date 4, 0-10… I can’t even begin to think!

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To be continued Next week

Written by :

Okon Bassey

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