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Long time ago, there lived two persons who believed they were in love, this love made a child named Damien. Abandoned at age three, had to stay with paternal grandparents.

Growing up, Damien didn’t have that “mothers love”, but was never worried. Why? Her father pays her school fees. This continued for a very very long time, same routine.

The older Damien gets, she begins to feel the need for a biological mother who she could share her everyday with, she has lost so many years unable to live as a child that has both happy parents. Damien decides to be a good child to her guardians, to show her appreciation for years past, she does everything required, she works for her guardians, works for her aunts too, takes care of their children, but little did she know it was a trap to sell her freedom, a trap to lose her normal teenage life.

At a normal teenage age, say 17, she has lost her right. Her father never spends time with her, she works, takes care of children and she runs errands every time she is being called upon, yet, her little efforts go unappreciated, instead, she’s called all kind of names which later resulted to having a low self esteem. She doesn’t have the right to visit friends, because day after day, she’s only involved in satisfying her guardians at her own happiness. This makes her suffer psychologically and physically but she can do nothing about it.

Damien is always sad, angry and worried because nobody hears what she has to say or things she needs to get done, she has lost her voice, cannot be heard. She transfers this anger into everything. She makes plans but has to abort it to carry out her guardians plans. She has lost friends, her social life is zero, she doesn’t go anywhere, always indoors. Sometimes she sits and cries asking God questions like “What have I done to deserve this kind of existence?”

Taking every challenge and situation as training and a phase of her life, but still wishes she can just live normally. She wishes she can combine her personal life activities with that of her guardians and not have to be out of her own existence. Every day she tries to find happiness by doing the same things that make her angry and disintegrated, with the believe and faith that things will get better very soon and to her advantage.

Damien hopes daily, that her father would at least spend time with her, her mother would come look for her lost child, she would be appreciated by her guardians for her little efforts and just wants to be happy.

 

Damien is in pursuit of Happyness.

Ayo Feyi

Good Luck Feyisayo Ayodele! :D

JUDGE’S REVIEWS

Unresolved conflicts...

★★☆☆☆
2 5 1
The story was left hanging; the conflicts were not resolved. The story would have benefited from proper editing and good tense usage.

Poor use of English...

★★☆☆☆
2 5 1
Nice idea, good story line but the poverty of the use of English and many grammatical errors rob the story of its deeply sympathetic powers. Not properly organized that one enters into the trouble of trying to fix it up.

Poor organisation

★★★★☆
4 5 1
First paragraph needs to be organized better so it can hold reader's attention. Tenses are misplaced. Punctuation marks. Storyline was presented but lost in marks misplaced and tenses misused.
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